EPISODE #19
Hey there friend! Today I have the pleasure of interviewing a special guest on the show, Michelle Beckner. Michelle is a tree-hugging, tea-loving, chemical engineer turned cyclical nutritionist. After struggling with her own fertility issues and hormone imbalances for years, she’s become an expert on simplifying cyclical living.
She’s now a mom of 3, but her path to motherhood was anything but easy. Michelle bravely opens up about the multiple miscarriages she’s had along the way. I was so inspired by her grace & resilience through it all, as well as her ability to trust in how her life was unfolding, while at the same time leaning into gratitude. She also shares about trusting her intuition throughout major life changes, which led to discovering her passion, and allowed her to lead a life that’s aligned with her values.
Listen to the Full Episode Here
Life Before Trying to Conceive
Michelle first started trying to conceive over 10 years ago. She and her husband were both engineers, living in New Orleans at the time, and were just enjoying life as newlyweds.
When they decided they were ready to start trying to have kids, she had been on birth control for 15 years at that point. It dawned on her that she really didn’t know much about her body and it took a while for her cycle to return. That led her to begin tracking her cycle and learning as much as she could about fertility and getting pregnant.
Michelle’s Personal Fertility Journey
Her desire to get pregnant quickly turned into an obsession and it almost felt like there was a cloud over her life at that point. Things like instagram weren’t around back then, so she began to pour into mommy blogs and community forums for information. Being able to connect with other women who could relate to what she was going through, really helped her during the tough times. Over the course of two years she experienced two miscarriages before conceiving her oldest daughter.
Sadly, Michelle went on to have multiple miscarriages throughout her journey. Some of them were between 8 and 12 weeks, but some were missed miscarriages and chemical pregnancies that happened early on. During that first pregnancy she remembers feeling so worried all the time, and naturally felt devastated when the first miscarriage happened.
She shares the many different emotions from guilt and shame that she experienced as she wondered if it was her fault. Most of all though, she felt so alone during this time and didn’t have anyone in her life to talk to about what she was experiencing.
This is why she openly shares about her journey now, so that more women can feel less alone and seek the support they need. To help bring additional closure, Michelle purchased a necklace with an angel wing and all of her kids’ birthstones, as a way of always remembering the babies she lost along the way.
Seeking Community and Talking Openly About Loss
Navigating through the experience of multiple losses continued to be challenging for Michelle. She states “it doesn’t get easier, but in a way you kind of understand how to take care of yourself better and how to get that support, and so it gets easier in the way that you know how to move through it.”
She started to speak up and be that voice amongst her friends group, so that if a friend or a neighbor experienced miscarriage, they’d know they had a safe space to come to her for support and advice. If you’re scared to tell others, because you don’t want to be a downer, trust that if you feel safe enough to open up to someone, then trust that they love you enough to want to support you and be there for you during this time. If you’re feeling called to open up to that person, it’s for a reason.
How to Support Others Experiencing Pregnancy Loss
The best thing you can do for others is just be there for them and listen to what they want to share. You don’t have to make them feel better, because most of the time just being that shoulder to cry on is exactly what they need.
Beyond that, don’t ask them how you can help, because they may not know. Instead, offer to bring over some food, or if they have other kids, offer to watch them for a few hours. Little gestures like this can really go a long way in letting them know how much you care.
Healing is a Journey & Gratitude
Michelle goes on to share her most recent miscarriages, which happened more recently. Both of them were surprise pregnancies as they thought they may be done having kids. Then she lost one at 12 weeks and the other stopped developing by the time they went for the first scan. She couldn’t help but feel guilty in a way and wondered how it may be her fault.
To cope with these feelings and emotions she had to realize that the healing journey is ongoing. Loss is never something you need to heal from and move past quickly. “It’s a journey and you don’t ever like get completely over it, but just know that you can move on and things are going to feel easier.”
“I am so grateful for these past 10 years of my life, especially since it all started with this fertility journey. I’m just so grateful for everything, the good times and the hard times. I’ve been through other health struggles, and everything’s brought me to exactly where I am today. With the family that I have today, living where we live today, doing the work that I do today. I never could have planned for it to be this way, but I’m so grateful — for all parts of the journey, the hard parts and the good parts.”
Leaning into Trust — From Engineer to Cyclical Nutritionist
Through each of her 3 children, she’s learned a new lesson. Her oldest daughter taught her to trust herself and lean into her intuition more. At the time she was working as a chemical engineer and the work she was doing was not in line with her values and beliefs. Having her daughter, made Michelle realize how precious time really is and how her current path felt so misaligned.
She decided to go back to school to be a health coach and a nutritionist. After starting off as a nutrition consultant at a child’s day care, one thing led to another and now she helps women understand their hormones and their cycles. “Slowly but surely, those breadcrumbs were there for me. I’m just trying to follow the path and follow this journey that I’m meant to be on.”
Something she’s been working on for a long time, whether if she’s sick, or having a miscarriage, is to change the mindset of automatically thinking something is wrong with you.
“If you’re struggling with fertility or anything, it’s always like, what’s wrong with me? Why isn’t this working? When really your body is working exactly the way it’s meant to. It’s telling you, hey. This isn’t what’s right for me right now. What can we do to get it in alignment? Your body is always working exactly the way it’s supposed to be working. It’s just a matter of listening to it and understanding its language — understanding what it’s trying to tell you.”
Learn More About Michelle and Her Work
Michelle combines hormone & nutrition science with cyclical energies to help women balance their hormones, lose weight, and reconnect with their bodies. At the heart of everything she teaches, she believes that when you understand your body, you love your body, and when you love your body, it’s effortless to take incredible care of yourself – and others. She helps women get started with Holistic Cycle tracking and works with women individually and in groups through her Cyclical Reset method.
I’ve had the pleasure of learning from Michelle through some of her courses and masterclasses, and I can tell you that she’s the real deal. Her unique holistic approach to cyclical living is so simple and practical, and it’ll help you have a better relationship with your cycle and your body overall.
You can connect with Michelle on her Instagram, learn more about her current offers, and check out her FREE Holistic Cycle Tracker and Masterclass.
I hope this conversation helps you realize the power of trust, as you continue on along your journey. Trust that you are on the right path and your life is unfolding just as it is meant to.
If you’re looking for additional support on your fertility journey, be sure to download the Fertility Affirmations Meditation I created just for you. It’s completely FREE and will provide you with a sense of comfort, all while helping to reignite the belief in your ability to get pregnant naturally.
